I'm a Scaredy Cat

I have discovered something about myself recently.  Perhaps I've known it for a long time, I'm really not sure, but I am really good at telling other people to have a go, to step out, hey what's the worst that can happen it doesn't work that's all, give it a go.  You know all that stuff and yet for myself I am a downright chicken.  I know the worst that can happen is I am rejected, I fail, I make a fool of myself, I am not as good as I think I am, on and on and on..... argh!!!!! And does any of that really matter?

So why am I like this?  I don't know and I'm not really in the mood for some deep self analysis right now, actually at all ever okay.  I just know I think everyone else can do it, but I can't.

What has brought this on you ask, well I had some very exciting news last night from my mum.  She is nearly 76 and in the last few years has learnt how to draw in pastels and charcoals.  She has always been pretty active, used to line dance, yes I admit I had a line dancing mother ha ha!  She was/is not sure anymore, a member of the red hat ladies, crazy women who wear purple dresses/outfits and big red hats and go out in public.  She has always been active and interested in local community etc.  So she learnt to draw.  Being a madly keen animal lover she decided she would draw animals and if she made any money selling the artwork she would donate it to the World Wide Funding for animal protection.  I think it's called WWF.  She approached them to ask if it was okay to say she was supporting them and of course they were very happy to accept her donations etc.  She has been a dynamo, she's joined the local art group in her area and has had recently a piece displayed in a gallery along side Brett Whitely.  Yeah I don't know him either but apparently he is very well known in the art world.  How uneducated and uncouth am I? ha ha!

Chameleon rose 3 colours on one bush beautiful.

So the latest is that she approached her local cultural centre and said that she had noticed that they often had blank wall space available, even when they had artists displaying their work and could she use it.  She explained about the animal funding and how any money she makes selling her pieces she donates to them and of course she is now having her own showing in March.  Unbelievable.  Well not really her work is outstanding, very life like and the animals look great.  Unbelievable from my point that she has so much spunk and went out there and pushed and the doors opened.  See I would have told her to do that, but I would have been too afraid to actually do it myself.  You know what if someone said no!!!!  Arghh!!!! I hate that about myself being such a fraidy cat.  I don't know where it has come from, I think I used to be so much more out there.  Now I am the complete opposite.  So my wonderful husband whom I adore, really I do, has said, and often take your pictures somewhere and see if they will show them.  I cringe inside.  I want to but I am so afraid of rejection.  I see incredible photographers here in Blogworld and they are making it.....Christina whose work is beautiful, recently was featured in Artful Blogging, congratulations girl, Melissa who has just started a new photography business and she is wonderful, Kim who not only takes wonderful photographs but makes the most incredible textures and shares them with us.  She runs wonderful e-course too you must check her out, see I can rattle of many incredibly talented women and yet I am so afraid to have a go myself.  I don't expect a solution from you, really I don't I know I just have to pull up my boot straps and do it.  It's actually doing it that is the hard part.

Anyway congratulations mum you amaze me, you are an incredible inspiration to me and I love you.  Actually mum's coming to visit tomorrow, she'll have Friday with Elle too.  So I'll see you next week I guess and let's see if I can become a brave woman sometime soon.

This is just a straight out of my camera shot of Ashleigh and Danielle with my mum.  Tiny isn't she?! Just so you know.